Friday, May 04, 2007


True Facts About Fred Thompson?

Ah, like "True Facts About Chuck Norris?" They don't quite get to that point of completely irreverent and just plain strange comedy, but they're often nearly as good, and they're more consistently funny than the "Mr T. Vs...." Internet comics that came out in a glut several years ago.

Here are a few facts about Fred Thompson:

* Fred Thompson has on multiple occasions pronounced "nuclear" correctly.
* Fred Thompson has blasted more people in the face with a shotgun than even Dick Cheney.
* The masked executioner of Saddam Hussein: Fred Thompson.
* Not only does Fred Thompson cut taxes, he cuts tax collectors.
* Fred Thompson is the only person to have ever bested Miyamato Mushashi in a duel. The reason Musashi is so vague about the book of the void is because the fifth ring of combat is really Fred Thompson.
* The reason Fred Thompson didn't want to stay in the Senate for long is because all the extra scrutiny kept him from doing his favorite hobby: Prowling the streets at night killing drug dealers.
* Every night before going to sleep, Osama bin Laden checks under his bed for Fred Thompson.
* Fred Thompson took over what was Al Gore's Senate seat, thereby dramatically reducing the Senate's carbon footprint. Fred Thompson then created carbon offset offsets by wastefully burning hippies.

1 Comments:

Blogger Ryan said...

That's hilarious. As a TN boy, I appreciate this!

27 May, 2007 21:29  

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